Before you merge
Traffic
Tantrum
This game has swearing, rude gestures and cartoon fights. You must be 17+ to play.
A comedy parody. Every character is made up and voiced by computer. Please don't copy any of this in a real car: real road rage hurts people.
Fair enough. Come back when you're old enough to sit in real traffic.
Traffic
Tantrum
This is you
Customize your driver
Look
Car
Voice
Every accent is a studio recording: you speak English with that accent, on any phone, nothing to install. Lower and Higher pick the male or female studio voice; Pitch nudges it. Lines you type yourself use the phone's own voice.
Favourite weapon
You start each round holding this. In a fight, the weapon button (or Q) still cycles through all of them.
Today's commuters
Meet the drivers
Hall of Shame
Who's the worst driver here?
Scores are kept on this device only. Set your name under Customize your driver.
The small print
About Traffic Tantrum
It's a parody
Traffic Tantrum is a comedy game. All characters, companies, signs and products in it are invented. Any resemblance to real people is a coincidence. The jokes are about driving and personalities, never about where anyone is from.
Please drive nice for real
Nothing here is advice. In a real car: no road rage, no speeding, no phone, and never get out to argue. If someone else is raging, stay in your car, lock the doors and call 911 if you feel unsafe.
Voices
Character voices are computer-generated (text-to-speech). They are not real people.
Your privacy
This version collects no personal information. Your settings and your custom driver are saved only on this device. Lines you type are matched on your device and never sent to us. If your device's built-in voice reads a typed line aloud, your phone or browser's own voice service handles that text under its own privacy terms.
Credits
Created by Niko. Logo art drawn by Niko's son. Built with help from Claude (Anthropic).
Open-source licences
three.js 3D engine, MIT licence, © 2010–2023 three.js authors. Bungee font © 2008 The Bungee Project Authors and Atkinson Hyperlegible font © 2020 Braille Institute of America, Inc., both under the SIL Open Font Licence 1.1. Full licence texts are in the game's vendor folder.
Contact
Questions, bugs or complaints: [support email]. Version 37.
© 2026 Niko. All rights reserved. The game's code, characters, dialogue and artwork may not be copied or resold.
Paused
Traffic has stopped. For once, on purpose.
Run over
Mild Inconvenience
#00000
Tantrum Offence Notice — Officer P. Kowalczyk
Turn your phone sideways
Traffic Tantrum is played in landscape. The game is paused.
Traffic
Tantrum
Merging onto the highway…